Monday, March 17, 2014

Life is weird

The house fell through. We aren't getting it. But!!! We broke up with it. Dear house, it's you. Not us. This may sound odd, but that fact alone makes me feel better. Empowered. We are in the drivers seat here. We make the decisions and have the final say around these parts. After the inspection we felt like something was off. It just didn't feel right. OK, the truth is, my dad and Jesse thought something was off. I was still in la-la-land (also known as the land of front porches, built-ins, and original woodwork). I'm glad my dad and husband snapped me out of it. We are buying a house because that is apparently what adults do? But more importantly, so we can afford to buy a baby (that phrase never fails to mind screw me). In the end, this house would have likely cost us a significant amount of money to maintain and bring up to our standard, even though it had recently been flipped. Go figure. What's the moral of this story? This house buying stuff is craziness. You think you're in...but you're never truly in until after the closing. Everyone made sure to warn me of this, but do I look like someone who heeds a clear warning? Please.

I am so glad I've been wearing my bloggin' pants through this, because I know it will be so nice to read back on this roller coaster part of our life. Much like our infertility stuff, I'm gonna write about the highs and lows of it all. I don't share my lows for any other reason than to ground myself, gain perspective, and most of all, to remind myself to be thankful when things are all good in the hood. I know it's human nature, but I've always gravitated toward focusing on the negative aspects of life. Womp, womp. I need to be reminded of the good and bad, to maintain a healthy balance. 

Let's talk about life for a hot minute, shall we? And not just mine. Life in general. It's weird. That's my unofficial tagline. Life. Is. Weird. I got life-is-weird news from three close friends this past week. One is deep in the throes of marriage troubles. Another was diagnosed with a funky disease that will affect her life from here on out. And another friend just found out her sweet six month old baby boy is not developing, and it is requiring intense physical therapy. There are times when I just want to be selfish and yell, "I don't want to know about this stuff!" How awful does that sound? Really awful. It's not how I truly feel, and I promise it's just a tiny fraction of it. In the end I am always humbled and honored, that in my friend's time of need, I am the one they seek out for comfort and advice. I am the one they trust with their life-is-weird moments. We all have our things. Babies aren't conceived with ease. We lose a parent way too soon. Our marriages get tested. We get sick. I am proud to be the person that allows my friends be vulnerable. They let me love and encourage them through tough times. And of couse, I get to rejoice right along side them when things are awesome too. I've chosen an amazingly fierce group of men and women as my friends. They are, without a doubt, the reason I am as strong as I am. 


18 comments:

Recently Roached said...

Sorry the house fell through, friend. :( I was so bummed when that happened to us. But it wasn't our decision, I mean it was... but a wonky foundation kinda forced our hand. Good for y'all for walking away. House hunting is like dating. Ya gotta date a ton of cruddy houses to end up with the perfect match. Y'all will find it! :)

Erika said...

Aww...boo about the house. :( House hunting was a pretty long and miserable process for us...whenever I'm feeling down about things, I like to go reread those frustrated blogs and just bask in how thankful I am I don't have to deal with that stuff anymore!! :) Life is indeed weird.

Lindsey @ Life on Countryside said...

bummer about the house - but better to find out now than later (thank you inspections!). Hang in there - everything happens for a reason (or so that's what I keep telling myself). Does it sound really bad if sometimes I want to scream "I don't want to hear about all of this" - when it's good stuff happening in peoples lives? Especially when I head 8367 people are getting engaged, married and found true love? Whooops - word vomit.

Amy said...

When we were house hunting this happened to us too. I was soooooo in love. SO IN LOVE. with a house and so convinced it was the one.

Our second adventure to the house, my dad and boyfriend climbed underneath only to find that it has major major foundation issues.

I was honestly heartbroken.

However... as I sit in the beautiful home that WAS the one... I am SO glad that other home didn't work out.

I guess I feel the same way about my ex-boyfriend. He wasn't the one either... I'm much more happy with my current one, and glad I found instead of settling for the other one :)

Tia @ Gilded TBags said...

Damn...this sounds like us last year! Only with trying to sell our own house. I blogged break-up letters and everything. Everything will work out how it is supposed to. You guys WILL find your dream home.

Katie said...

I'm sorry you had to break up with the house. You will definitely not regret that decision though, the perfect house is out there!! We broke up with a house too after our offer was accepted for similar reasons to yours. I still sometimes wonder about that house, but I know it was the right decision.

~Dawn~ said...

I loved that house. But, I'm so glad that you made the decision to break-up! There are so many other options out there. Keep looking!

Carolyn said...

I'm sorry about the house! :( We fell in love with a house that we ended up not getting before finding our house, and I am SO GLAD that it happened that way. Keep hunting - you'll find it!

And blogging pants - BAHAHAHA! I love it!

Belle Vierge said...

It's better to find out the house isn't perfect NOW than after closing on it. The right house will come, at the right time.

Miki {Becoming What I Always Was} said...

Life is weird, that's true. I'm glad the house fell through and you guys broke up with it. You'll find your perfect match somewhere along this weird journey. I am sending my good vibes out to all 3 of your friends :)

Aubrey said...

I'm sorry about the house, but there's sure to be another one, a better one right around the corner :)
And you're right... Life is weird and sometimes it's really hard and stinky, too!
XOXO

Claire said...

Sorry about the house. I so want to buy one too but our finances as of the moment won't allow it. I have a fourteen-year-old boy I love with all my heart but I still want to have another baby...a girl this time. I'm taking fertility pills....funny, I never had to do anything when I was younger. Good luck to us.

Laura and Sarah said...

Sorry to hear about this, but you're right - at least its your decision! You don't want to rush into one that may cost you way more money in the long run. You have much more important (little adorable) things to spend that on!

I sound super wise saying this, but it's SO HARD to put into practice. I'm of the instant gratification generation! :D

Laura xx

Melissa @ i carry your heart said...

Sorry about the house, friend! :( It's so true that everyone is fighting their own battles no matter how "perfect" their life may look from the outside.

Sarah said...

I'm not even going to say bummer about the house 'cuz I'm not sad about it--dude, a house is a HUGE commitment, so you could have accidentally wound up in a horrible situation. (As someone who accidentally bought a 2nd story condo that happened to be above a legit crazy lady, trust me on this one--you got out quick.) I have faith that a better, more perfect house will come along soon!

ajs {of MN} said...

i am bummed about the hosue for you guys but really... that house didn't get YOU... it's that house's loss, not yours! ;)

Jennifer Prod said...

"I am proud to be the person that allows my friends be vulnerable." - they should make a trophy for that :) keep spreading the love.

Leah D said...

Your posts always have some sort of good feeling message. Love it!